I just realized today that it has been a long time since I posted anything on my blog. Honestly, I have really felt like it.

2018 has been a less than stellar year in the life of Richard.

Fighting the worst bout of depression since I’ve had since I was a teenager along with a sick dad and one business opportunity after another blowing up in my face, I’ve not really felt like sharing much. Then again, I haven’t done much to warrant writing about.

Most days it takes about all the willpower I have to get out of bed, shower and do my job. Anything more than that I just don’t have the energy, interest, or inclination to do. Which sucks, because there is a lot of things I would like to do and get done.

I slacked off on my working out. So much for my goal of competing in the Oregon Strongman competition this year. Hell, I am in worse shape now than I was this time last year. I got a bunch of writing done for my various novels, novellas, and short stories but ended up trashing them because, well they sucked. However, I have made what I think are much better improvements in the storylines and world building that was missing in the first drafts. So I really don’t feel bad about scraping the 35k or so words. The issue is getting the motivation to write.

Job wise I have a job I tolerate ok and it pays the bills. I’ve been working on other projects that have blown up because of a lack of funding or people just bailing on it. Had a really good bright spot there in the last month. A gentleman I’ve known for about 5 years and worked with at my last job was talking to me about going into business together. He has the money and the connections, I got the technical talent. Its a perfect match. We had a long discussion about what we needed to do, how we were going to structure the thing and the general goal. We ended the conversation with a plan to meet up next week in Vegas, where he lives, to huddle and gets the basics done. The next day I get a call from his wife, 4 hours after our call, he had a massive heart attack and he’s not expected to survive. So that really kicked me in the teeth.

All is not lost thought.

I’ve been fighting this depression that’s been keeping me down. I’ve made it may goal to do more each day and just continue to push through this. One of things I plan to do is write more often, on here and on my stories. I got too much to do to keep wasting my time wallowing in this depression.

Anyway, off for a walk and then lunch.